I don't get homesick much. The worst time ever was when I took a 7-day trip to Japan in May without Jim.
Several people have asked me if I miss Japan. I thought I would. Twelve years (over the course of 21) spent in a place I loved and where I hoped to live 'til I retired would naturally lead to homesickness, right? My only answer is, "God is merciful. When He wanted me in Japan, He helped me love being there. When He directed me to marry Jim, He changed my desires."
I recently spoke with a returned missionary who asked me about culture shock, and admitted that about once a week I hit up against reverse culture shock. The other ladies in our conversation, who see me as an American living in America, seemed mystified.
So, I'm used to culture shock moments, but not so much to homesick moments. ...
... Until today, when I came across an organizing tip using paper shopping bags with handles. And, instantly, I was homesick for Japan and for my collection of paper bags with handles, stored in my hall closet.
Life in Japan is a constant flow of paper bags ... receiving items in a paper bag, passing on items in a paper bag. I have two or three such bags in my closet now ... and I'm hesitant to use them for fear I'll never replace them.
Am I alone in my bag homesickness?
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Living? or Living online?
In an upper level Urban Geography class in college, a guest came to talk to us about the future of social interactions.
"You'll no longer have to go to the bank, or the grocery store, or ... . You'll sit at home and push buttons on your computer to do all that." She tried to explain to our uncomprehending minds what it would mean to "do it online."
Now we know. And I wonder what guests talk about in Urban Geography classes these days?
Tim Challies writes in "The Pain of Loneliness:"
And Amy Scott writes, in "Contentment, that slippery thing:"
"You'll no longer have to go to the bank, or the grocery store, or ... . You'll sit at home and push buttons on your computer to do all that." She tried to explain to our uncomprehending minds what it would mean to "do it online."
Now we know. And I wonder what guests talk about in Urban Geography classes these days?
Tim Challies writes in "The Pain of Loneliness:"
A man with 100 Facebook friends is still a lonely man. A man with two significant real-world friends considers himself blessed.
And Amy Scott writes, in "Contentment, that slippery thing:"
I know that everyone else is happy because last year I signed up for Facebook and now I have friends.I have significant real-world friends, many of whom are FB friends also. But most of my significant real-world friends don't live within a hundred ... or five hundred ... or five thousand miles. God is graciously giving me significant friends here. How, in this media-crazed world, does one keep a balance between online and real-world friends?
Monday, July 25, 2011
Friday, July 22, 2011
Rich!
I live in a rich nation. I live in a rich era. Rich with resources... resources for Christian growth.
I find myself becoming excited each time I hear of a Christian concert coming to the area. Even though we rarely go, and half the time it's not a musical style I like. I'm just enamored with the unfamiliar-to-me idea of having Christian concerts available that one could choose to attend!
Living on the other side of the world, English concerts (other than black gospel music) weren't that prevalent, and Christian concerts were even less. One December I excitedly gathered a group to go to hear Handel's Messiah. We cleared our calendars, arranged rides, found directions, made it there, and sat down with bated breath for the first song, which came out of the choir's mouths in Japanese. ...
I have too many books, and access to thousands and thousands more ... through InterLibrary Loan, through Paperback Swap, and, for a price, through any one of a number of booksellers.
If I don't like the music playing on the Christian radio station, I can just switch to another Christian radio station.
This is all disorienting for me, after so many years of relative dearth. I'm left wondering how I should respond and what I should do to keep margin in my life and in my mind.
I find myself becoming excited each time I hear of a Christian concert coming to the area. Even though we rarely go, and half the time it's not a musical style I like. I'm just enamored with the unfamiliar-to-me idea of having Christian concerts available that one could choose to attend!
Living on the other side of the world, English concerts (other than black gospel music) weren't that prevalent, and Christian concerts were even less. One December I excitedly gathered a group to go to hear Handel's Messiah. We cleared our calendars, arranged rides, found directions, made it there, and sat down with bated breath for the first song, which came out of the choir's mouths in Japanese. ...
I have too many books, and access to thousands and thousands more ... through InterLibrary Loan, through Paperback Swap, and, for a price, through any one of a number of booksellers.
If I don't like the music playing on the Christian radio station, I can just switch to another Christian radio station.
This is all disorienting for me, after so many years of relative dearth. I'm left wondering how I should respond and what I should do to keep margin in my life and in my mind.
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Love language
When asked what I wanted for an anniversary present, I said I'd only like one thing ... to clean and organize the garage together.
I am beyond happy!!
It's only half the truth that I said I'd like only a clean garage. I also said I'd like a card, and who would have known that Farm & Fleet (like Tractor Supply) sells some pretty romantic anniversary cards?!
I am beyond happy!!
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| Can we say, "Like with like?" |
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| Filters - I think |
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| These hooks with red ends |
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| Gloves |
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| Cooler, anyone? |
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| Dirty laundry from who knows when or where |
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Cultural adaptation
When Sunday lunch at church was served on low tables, requiring that I sit on the floor, week after week, for years, I did it.
When everyone else bowed instead of shaking hands, I bowed, too.
When others around me did not eat or drink while walking down the street, I, too, refrained.
When everyone slipped their shoes off upon entering a home or school or church building, so did I.
And there are countless other examples of ways my new culture had been doing life for centuries, if not millennia, before I showed up. I adapted. That's all there was to it.
And then I entered the new culture known as marriage. I knew that this particular culture would be brand-new and that Jim and I would forge our own customs and traditions and ways of doing things, unique to us. My mom always told me,
My default, practiced for almost two decades,was is to observe carefully, adapt accordingly, and periodically to find a neutral location or relationship in which to relieve any accumulated stress, so that I could continue adapting as necessary in the new culture.
It worked fine in Japan! But I wasn't immigrating.
Moving into the new culture of marriage, I'm immigrating. For life.
And it's not going to be helpful if I spend my married life, thinking, "Who am I to challenge the way my new culture does things?" and then coping by constantly having to go to a neutral location or relationship in which to relieve any pent-up stress.
And so we are discovering together a new way of doing some things in our new culture. In some areas, we follow "my culture." In some areas, we follow "his culture." In some areas, we forge a new culture. No new observation for my readers, but working it out in real life has been a new experience for me.
Who was I to challenge the way my new culture did things?
When everyone else bowed instead of shaking hands, I bowed, too.
Who was I to challenge the way my new culture did things?
When others around me did not eat or drink while walking down the street, I, too, refrained.
Who was I to challenge the way my new culture did things?
When everyone slipped their shoes off upon entering a home or school or church building, so did I.
Who was I to challenge the way my new culture did things?
And there are countless other examples of ways my new culture had been doing life for centuries, if not millennia, before I showed up. I adapted. That's all there was to it.
And then I entered the new culture known as marriage. I knew that this particular culture would be brand-new and that Jim and I would forge our own customs and traditions and ways of doing things, unique to us. My mom always told me,
"Even if you marry the boy next door, it's a cross-cultural relationship, because family is the smallest subset of culture, and each family is different."But I moved into his world (a world that had had some decades to develop its own culture and patterns), and thus the lines weren't as clear as to what exactly defined our new culture. How much of my adapting was adapting to our new culture of marriage and how much of my adapting was adapting to his world?
My default, practiced for almost two decades,
It worked fine in Japan! But I wasn't immigrating.
Moving into the new culture of marriage, I'm immigrating. For life.
And it's not going to be helpful if I spend my married life, thinking, "Who am I to challenge the way my new culture does things?" and then coping by constantly having to go to a neutral location or relationship in which to relieve any pent-up stress.
And so we are discovering together a new way of doing some things in our new culture. In some areas, we follow "my culture." In some areas, we follow "his culture." In some areas, we forge a new culture. No new observation for my readers, but working it out in real life has been a new experience for me.
Thursday, July 14, 2011
1000 Gifts, Vol. 3, #98
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| What is the name of this item? |
982. Another thrift store find: this 5-year diary. Remember how much trouble I had finding one this year? Now I'm ready for 2016. :) And when you average out the price of this one (99 cents) with the price of the one I found in January, it's okay.
983. Free entertainment - I put on Facebook that I was "
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Monday, July 11, 2011
1000 Gifts, Vol. 3, #97
971. horizon of a farm town at 8 AM when driving east ... out of the flat prairie rises a bunch of treetops, and then high above even the trees, a grain elevator and several bins
972. early morning workers ... construction crew building a house in our neighborhood, farm crew standing in a circle probably receiving orders for the day, port-a-potty sitting at the corner of the field
973. a few fields beginning to tassle
974. hiking ... in the woods ... surrounded by green and cool and shade ... to a canyon and a waterfall
975. four days of nonstop family
976. grace for this introvert to take timeouts to recharge
977. a rapid-fire game of Dutch Blitz
978. 50-cent paperbacks at thrift stores
979. about 20 phone calls checked off my to-do list
980. a quiet home and neighborhood
972. early morning workers ... construction crew building a house in our neighborhood, farm crew standing in a circle probably receiving orders for the day, port-a-potty sitting at the corner of the field
973. a few fields beginning to tassle
974. hiking ... in the woods ... surrounded by green and cool and shade ... to a canyon and a waterfall
975. four days of nonstop family
976. grace for this introvert to take timeouts to recharge
977. a rapid-fire game of Dutch Blitz
978. 50-cent paperbacks at thrift stores
979. about 20 phone calls checked off my to-do list
980. a quiet home and neighborhood
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
This Kitchen is Brought to You by ...
My kitchen proves that I am a farmer's wife.
My cake server is compliments of DeKalb seed corn.
A great knife is compliments of the old Farmer's Bank in town.
Jim came home from a farming seminar last week with a pizza cutter advertising a tillage service.
Of course, long before I was a farmer's wife, I was a farmer's daughter, with a round rubber lid opener courtesy of the U.S. Department of Agriculture.
My cake server is compliments of DeKalb seed corn.
A great knife is compliments of the old Farmer's Bank in town.
Jim came home from a farming seminar last week with a pizza cutter advertising a tillage service.
Of course, long before I was a farmer's wife, I was a farmer's daughter, with a round rubber lid opener courtesy of the U.S. Department of Agriculture.
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
90 Days of God's Goodness
In his book, 90 Days of God's Goodness, Randy Alcorn does not claim to provide answers to the question, "If God is good, why is there evil and suffering in the world?" Instead he points his readers to God's character and ultimately to Jesus.
90 Days of God's Goodness: Daily Reflections That Shine Light on Personal Darkness is a 305-page hardcover book by Randy Alcorn, who also wrote the 528-page If God Is Good: Faith in the Midst of Suffering and Evil.
Each day's reading begins with some Scripture verses and ends with a brief prayer Alcorn has written. Sandwiched between, we have Alcorn's meditation based on that day's Scripture passage. And woven throughout, he includes heart-wrenching examples of those who suffer ... a person born with a facial abnormality, a man dying of AIDS, those who lost multiple family members. The list goes on. After reading this book, one might think, "There's even more evil and suffering in the world than I knew!"
But Alcorn also provides a steady dose of Jesus, a steady dose of a perspective focused on God's attributes, and a steady dose of comfort.
This is a book I would feel very comfortable giving a friend who is suffering. Each day's reading is brief enough to not be overwhelming, he provides almost daily stories of or quotes from real people with real suffering, and any one of the readings can stand alone as a source of comfort and hope.
90 Days of God's Goodness: Daily Reflections That Shine Light on Personal Darkness is a 305-page hardcover book by Randy Alcorn, who also wrote the 528-page If God Is Good: Faith in the Midst of Suffering and Evil.
Each day's reading begins with some Scripture verses and ends with a brief prayer Alcorn has written. Sandwiched between, we have Alcorn's meditation based on that day's Scripture passage. And woven throughout, he includes heart-wrenching examples of those who suffer ... a person born with a facial abnormality, a man dying of AIDS, those who lost multiple family members. The list goes on. After reading this book, one might think, "There's even more evil and suffering in the world than I knew!"
But Alcorn also provides a steady dose of Jesus, a steady dose of a perspective focused on God's attributes, and a steady dose of comfort.
This is a book I would feel very comfortable giving a friend who is suffering. Each day's reading is brief enough to not be overwhelming, he provides almost daily stories of or quotes from real people with real suffering, and any one of the readings can stand alone as a source of comfort and hope.
I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group in exchange for my honest review, as part of their Blogging for Books program.
It only lasts a lifetime!
What does it mean to live by faith?
I remember being struck (by the obvious) in college, when a friend said,
Recently a friend encouraged me,
I remember being struck (by the obvious) in college, when a friend said,
"This life on earth is our only chance to live by faith."Well, yes, now that you mention it. Once we get to heaven we will not be living by faith, but by sight. Lord, haste the day!
Recently a friend encouraged me,
"Hang tough. Sanctification only lasts a lifetime!"The opportunities to live by faith ... the times when we feel that sanctification is more than we signed up for ... are fleeting in light of eternity.
Monday, July 4, 2011
Celebrate!
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| From thrift stores and garage sales |
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| Perhaps my best thrift store deal ever |
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| Fun craft idea for other people :) |
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| From a regular store - and using a candle I had (and showing my paper-strewn surfaces) |
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Snippets of a Mid-summer Sunday
We were surprised to see them in church, and asked what the occasion was.
"62 years ago this afternoon we were married in the old chapel here," she answered, while leaning on her cane, smiles on both of their faces.
Someone asked if the basement of the chapel had been built at that point. "Oh, no," she quickly answered, "And the outhouse was out behind the garage.
"God has been so good to us. We have no reason to complain," he piped up. "We've had a good life. And I have a good wife."
I'm so very thankful for this couple and others like them who magnify Christ in their life and marriage over the decades.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A few hours later, I sat in the lobby of the Best Western, while six Gideons went room-to-room, checking the Bibles, and replacing ones that had been damaged or were missing. Last time they had visited this hotel, there were three Bibles to replace. This time there were 15. Are people more desperate?
Thankful for the Word of God getting out.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
And a few miles away, a Japanese pastor's wife gave greetings and said, "Thank you!" to a church which gave its Easter offering for relief efforts in Japan. This pastor's wife and her husband serve in a church in the devastated region. We have mutual friends, but it did not work out for me to meet her during her whirlwind trip to our area.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A few hours later, five women sat around a dining room table, with plates of goodies, prayer lists, and color-coded manuscripts of Luke's Gospel, spread in front of us. Two hours flew by as we devoured food for our bodies and food for our souls, bared our hearts, and bore each others' burdens in prayer. A mom of young children, a (young) career woman, an (older) newlywed, a recent retiree, and a single woman, we don't appear to share much in common, but faith and time in the Word has knit our hearts together.
"62 years ago this afternoon we were married in the old chapel here," she answered, while leaning on her cane, smiles on both of their faces.
Someone asked if the basement of the chapel had been built at that point. "Oh, no," she quickly answered, "And the outhouse was out behind the garage.
"God has been so good to us. We have no reason to complain," he piped up. "We've had a good life. And I have a good wife."
I'm so very thankful for this couple and others like them who magnify Christ in their life and marriage over the decades.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A few hours later, I sat in the lobby of the Best Western, while six Gideons went room-to-room, checking the Bibles, and replacing ones that had been damaged or were missing. Last time they had visited this hotel, there were three Bibles to replace. This time there were 15. Are people more desperate?
Thankful for the Word of God getting out.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
And a few miles away, a Japanese pastor's wife gave greetings and said, "Thank you!" to a church which gave its Easter offering for relief efforts in Japan. This pastor's wife and her husband serve in a church in the devastated region. We have mutual friends, but it did not work out for me to meet her during her whirlwind trip to our area.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A few hours later, five women sat around a dining room table, with plates of goodies, prayer lists, and color-coded manuscripts of Luke's Gospel, spread in front of us. Two hours flew by as we devoured food for our bodies and food for our souls, bared our hearts, and bore each others' burdens in prayer. A mom of young children, a (young) career woman, an (older) newlywed, a recent retiree, and a single woman, we don't appear to share much in common, but faith and time in the Word has knit our hearts together.
Saturday, July 2, 2011
Orientation
It had been a long time since I had moved someplace completely new to me. I didn't necessarily have the luxury of 18 years to learn how to live as an adult in this place, nor did I have a roommate who had just arrived a few months ahead of me and available to answer my questions. There was no orientation manual.
But I kept my eyes and ears open. I took notes (two were on our fridge for many months before being relegated to the inside of a cupboard door) of the hours and days that the bank and post office are open. I picked up helpful handouts at the library or bank (Bonus: they're all in English!).
I slowly learned a few main routes to neighboring cities. And I paid attention to all context clues, which in America includes street signs (again, in English!). The result of that is that I know names of some roads that Jim has never had to learn.
I know I'm still not up to speed on geography of this state. People are all the time sprinkling their conversation with, "I'm from x," or "She had to go to y-ville," and I sometimes act like I understand, but other times I get a puzzled look on my face and admit, "I'm not from here. Where is that?" (Of course, their answer isn't always helpful, if they explain where it is relative to another town.)
None of the examples mentioned above are life-threatening; they're just pride-threatening.
But I've found one item of local knowledge that could be life-threatening if I do not learn it. I need to know how to find our village on a map when there are no city names listed. During a tornado watch or warning, I turn on the TV, but the map showing where the tornado has been or may be spotted is only a map of the state (or only our region of the state) with county lines. Period. And so I have quickly tried to memorize what our county looks like. And then where in those lines we live.
But I kept my eyes and ears open. I took notes (two were on our fridge for many months before being relegated to the inside of a cupboard door) of the hours and days that the bank and post office are open. I picked up helpful handouts at the library or bank (Bonus: they're all in English!).
I slowly learned a few main routes to neighboring cities. And I paid attention to all context clues, which in America includes street signs (again, in English!). The result of that is that I know names of some roads that Jim has never had to learn.
I know I'm still not up to speed on geography of this state. People are all the time sprinkling their conversation with, "I'm from x," or "She had to go to y-ville," and I sometimes act like I understand, but other times I get a puzzled look on my face and admit, "I'm not from here. Where is that?" (Of course, their answer isn't always helpful, if they explain where it is relative to another town.)
None of the examples mentioned above are life-threatening; they're just pride-threatening.
But I've found one item of local knowledge that could be life-threatening if I do not learn it. I need to know how to find our village on a map when there are no city names listed. During a tornado watch or warning, I turn on the TV, but the map showing where the tornado has been or may be spotted is only a map of the state (or only our region of the state) with county lines. Period. And so I have quickly tried to memorize what our county looks like. And then where in those lines we live.
Friday, July 1, 2011
Cooking Adventures
I've had my share of cooking misadventures, so want to take time to savor the cooking adventures that didn't go awry.
Yesterday I needed to use up some zucchini, and a friend had just been talking about vegetable soup. Some time spent perusing the pages of Simply in Season led to my making a zucchini chowder, which was a surprisingly great hit!
Just before noon, realizing that I really couldn't call that a midday meal for a farmer, I scurried to find what else I could prepare. A can of salmon was quickly transformed into salmon patties, which were also a great hit!
Quick, tasty, filling, healthy, a change from our routine, creative, not stressful ... all in all, a great success!
I made rhubarb muffins in the afternoon, and we both considered them a treat at breakfast.
We both were happy with today's lunch as well. Creamed beef on toast is one of Jim's favorites, and takes no time whatsoever to make. Two portobello mushroom caps were marked down for quick sale at the local IGA. Betty Crocker had a recipe for grilling sauce, and George Foreman grilled them nicely for me. Fresh lettuce from a friend's garden topped off my meal, while Jim finished up the fruited jello.
24 (or 25) hours of cooking adventures. Yeah!
Yesterday I needed to use up some zucchini, and a friend had just been talking about vegetable soup. Some time spent perusing the pages of Simply in Season led to my making a zucchini chowder, which was a surprisingly great hit!
Just before noon, realizing that I really couldn't call that a midday meal for a farmer, I scurried to find what else I could prepare. A can of salmon was quickly transformed into salmon patties, which were also a great hit!
Quick, tasty, filling, healthy, a change from our routine, creative, not stressful ... all in all, a great success!
I made rhubarb muffins in the afternoon, and we both considered them a treat at breakfast.
We both were happy with today's lunch as well. Creamed beef on toast is one of Jim's favorites, and takes no time whatsoever to make. Two portobello mushroom caps were marked down for quick sale at the local IGA. Betty Crocker had a recipe for grilling sauce, and George Foreman grilled them nicely for me. Fresh lettuce from a friend's garden topped off my meal, while Jim finished up the fruited jello.
24 (or 25) hours of cooking adventures. Yeah!
Learn. Forget. Repeat. Repeat & Repeat & Repeat ...
Blogger Veronica Mitchell writes:
Some years ago a wise friend suggested that it's not as it seems. I am not going in circles, hitting up against the same struggle each time I round the bend, and never making progress in life.
Instead, she said, consider that you're on a spiral staircase, and each time you round the bend, yes, you do hit up against the same struggle. (It's as if it's a vertical pole, so it touches the spiral staircase every. time. you. go. around.)
But, the big difference is that each time you hit it, you've grown, you have that much more of life experience ... and experiencing God ... under your belt. You are not the same person, nor are you in the same place, each time you face that same struggle.
The surprise to me is when I find new places in my life where I have not really let that belief shine all the way in. I say I believe in our dependence on a redemptive, omnipotent God, but I live as though my hard work created the universe.From the time my college friend in InterVarsity Christian Fellowship gave me a booklet on burnout, to some times of brownout or burnout in Japan, and throughout the many times where respiratory infections sidelined me, I always keep coming back to the same lesson. You'd think I'd have mastered it by now. Wishful thinking.
Some years ago a wise friend suggested that it's not as it seems. I am not going in circles, hitting up against the same struggle each time I round the bend, and never making progress in life.
Instead, she said, consider that you're on a spiral staircase, and each time you round the bend, yes, you do hit up against the same struggle. (It's as if it's a vertical pole, so it touches the spiral staircase every. time. you. go. around.)
But, the big difference is that each time you hit it, you've grown, you have that much more of life experience ... and experiencing God ... under your belt. You are not the same person, nor are you in the same place, each time you face that same struggle.
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